Character Is What Remains: A Reflection on Life, Work, and the Legacy We Leave
Episode #363
Last week, I attended the funeral of a man who had worked for our company for 25 years. He was deeply woven into the fabric of our organization—one of those steady presences who quietly held things together. He died too young, and the ceremony was filled with friends, family, coworkers, and members of the community who came to say goodbye.
As his manager, I came into the service with the perspective of someone who had worked closely with him. I knew him as a kind, capable engineer—someone always willing to lend a hand. But during the service, I realized something striking. While his career was mentioned briefly, the focus of the eulogies—the true story that was told—was about his character. His warmth. His generosity. His love for his family and even his dogs. His relationships.
That left an impression on me.
At funerals, what people remember isn’t just your job title or the company you worked for—it’s who you were. Your character. The impact you left behind. And for those of us who look to Stoicism for guidance, this aligns perfectly with one of its most important lessons: live a good life. Be a good person. When your time comes, the world won’t be measuring your worth by your resume, but by the way you treated others.
But on the drive home, I started to see another layer. There’s this popular idea—especially on social media—that your job and your work don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. That what people remember isn’t your output but your kindness. And while that’s partly true, I think there’s a deeper connection here that often gets missed.
Work is a reflection of your character. The way you show up, the effort you put in, the integrity you carry into your tasks—these are not separate from who you are. They are who you are.
Now, of course, not all work is virtuous. Simply going to work doesn’t mean you have good character. We can all think of historical examples of people doing their jobs—and doing terrible things. But when you work with discipline, integrity, and a genuine desire to make things better for those around you, that becomes a powerful expression of who you are.
And when you do that over time, something happens. You become capable. You become competent. And from that foundation, you’re in a position to care for your family, support your community, love generously, and give freely. That’s the iceberg under the surface. People may only see the kindness—but underneath it is a lifetime of consistency, responsibility, and personal development that allowed that kindness to flourish.
The gentleman we lost was all of this. He showed up for the company. He worked hard. He helped others. He was calm in the face of chaos—a calmness that came from experience and competence. And because of that solid foundation, he could love fully, serve generously, and build a life that made an impression on everyone around him.
This is a reminder to all of us: the way you work, the way you show up, it all matters. It’s how you shape your character. It’s how you contribute to the world.
And it’s not just about working. It’s about doing what the Stoics call “appropriate action”—being a part of something larger than yourself. Being a part of a team. Supporting your community. Being there when people need you. Offering what you’ve learned, what you’ve earned, what you’ve built, to others.
That’s what virtue looks like.
So look around—at your coworkers, your family, your neighbors. Be grateful for them. Don’t take anyone for granted. Life is short. Much shorter than we often admit. Sometimes we only realize this when we lose someone.
And in the meantime, ask yourself: How am I showing up? Am I bringing integrity, kindness, and excellence into the world around me? Because when your time comes, and it will come, you won’t be there to hear what people say about you.
But if you’ve lived well—if you’ve shown up with virtue and love—there will be people gathered. And they will say good things.
Not because you asked them to.
But because you earned it.