Stoicism at the Scene of the Crash: A True Test of Philosophy in Motion
Episode #365
It was a typical Saturday night. The kind where you’re winding down after a good time — maybe a game of pool, maybe something else — and you’re almost home. That was me a few weeks ago. It was around 11 PM, and as I turned right at an intersection, I noticed another car turning left… directly into mine. I stopped, expecting them to notice and adjust. They didn’t. Instead, they drove straight into the front of my car, damaging the fender, blinker, and fog light.
The driver, visibly shaken, got out of the car in tears and admitted fault on the spot. I stayed calm. I remembered: I’ve been in her shoes before — caused accidents myself. It’s not fun. It feels like your whole world flips in an instant, and your stomach drops at the thought of premiums rising, deductibles looming, and the hassle to come.
And in that moment, I leaned on Stoicism — not as a theory, but as a practical philosophy.
Step One: Accepting and Admitting the Truth
The Stoic accepts the truth — always. If you caused the accident, you admit it. If you didn’t, you calmly explain what happened. In this case, the other driver accepted full responsibility. I gave her kindness because she was honest, and because, well, I’ve been there. Accidents don’t just break cars. They break nerves, too.
Step Two: Be Kind, Even When It’s Hard
She offered to pay in cash. I agreed to get a quote. Weeks passed. No quote — garages didn’t want to deal with it since it wasn’t an insurance job. And then, the letter came: “There is a claim against your vehicle. You are deemed at fault.”
And that’s the fear, isn’t it? That even after a calm, truthful agreement, someone reverses course — blames you, reports a lie, and lets the system sort it out.
So what now?
Step Three: The Stoic Responds, Not Reacts
A Stoic tells the truth — calmly, factually, and without resentment. I called my insurance, explained everything, and prepared to make my case. I didn’t rant. I didn’t accuse. I just reported the truth.
But Stoicism also asks: What if this doesn’t go my way?
What if she lies and gets away with it? What if the insurance believes her?
Well — then I’m out a thousand bucks. My premium goes up. Not ideal, but still manageable. Life goes on. And I still did the right thing.
Step Four: Practice Premeditatio Malorum (Premeditation of Evils)
Stoics prepare themselves for what might go wrong. Not to panic — but to maintain equanimity. What if injustice happens? What if someone lies and is rewarded for it?
If that’s the outcome, then so be it. It doesn’t touch your character. It doesn’t touch your integrity. And it doesn’t take your peace — unless you give it away.
Step Five: Let Go of Bitterness
This is the hardest part.
You have to search your heart and find no ill will toward the person who hurt you — even if they lied, even if they cost you money. You don’t know their story. Maybe they’re desperate. Maybe they’ve hit rock bottom. Maybe they think they have no other option. You just don’t know.
And it’s not your job to judge them. Only to act justly yourself.
Truth, Humanity, and Forgiveness
Interestingly, when I asked the insurance adjuster how often people lie in claims, he said: most people tell the truth.That was a powerful reminder that despite how it might feel — humanity still leans toward honesty.
But even if someone doesn’t, your job remains the same.
Tell the truth.
Be kind.
Accept the outcome.
Let go of resentment.
Remember: they are your fellow human.
Stoicism doesn’t guarantee a smooth road. It gives you the tools to drive it with grace — especially when someone else crashes into your lane.
So, to anyone facing a similar test: don’t just know your philosophy. Live it. Even in moments of collision — literal or metaphorical — Stoicism offers not just a way to endure, but a way to flourish.